Chapter 853: Nurturer
“But even so, the Crescent Moon who has spoken to me and held conversations like this until now could still be considered an individual, couldn’t she? She wasn’t so different from the other Transcendents.”
–I did, without question, originate from the Crescent Moon.
A single strand of moonlight descended.
The hand holding my sword twitched instinctively, but the light was harmless, devoid of any power. It reached Seong Hyunjae, who moved his hand as though gently catching it. The silver strand shimmered between his fingers.
–The Crescent Moon did not hear only the voices of the present. Every voice from the past and future reached the moon. Every world the Origin had devoured, every world it was devouring, and every world it would one day devour. In the end, nothing remained.
The end of all life.
The moonlight vanished from the sky. The countless stars lost their glow as well, leaving only darkness behind.
An empty expanse without a single living thing left to breathe.
Had the Crescent Moon heard the final screams of all those dying worlds?
–The Crescent Moon once agreed with the system’s impartial and appropriately limited intervention. But that was when the worlds were expected to continue existing. The moment she learned that everything she loved would come to an end, the Crescent Moon’s scales tipped.
I remembered those night dark eyes, the moon reflected in them as they turned toward me.
I did not know what the Crescent Moon had thought or what emotions she had felt.
But surely…
It had been enough to break even a Transcendent.
–If the Origin disappears, the worlds will disappear as well. But if the Origin is left alone, only the worlds will disappear.
“And that was why she wanted to create a new Origin.”
–At first, the Crescent Moon attempted to study herself. But so long as she remained the being named the Crescent Moon, she could never become full. To become the full moon, her very existence would have to be remade.
“Is that why you called me the little moon?”
Seong Hyunjae spoke while watching the moonlight circle his fingertips.
“A little moon meant to grow and gradually become full.”
–A little moon, for now. Yes. The Crescent Moon discovered the possibility within you and began to nurture it. From that moment onward, she had already ceased to be impartial. She had acquired a singular purpose.
The Crescent Moon spoke dispassionately, as though judging someone else.
No.
The Crescent Moon truly was someone else to her now.
–Love distributed equally among every existence ultimately requires that nothing be given to anyone. One must simply look down from above, like the moon, the sun, or the stars. But the Crescent Moon wanted to give. That was when she began to distort. Perhaps her fate was decided from the moment she became the Crescent Moon.
The crescent moon, rather than the full moon.
A being incomplete from the moment she was named.
–The moonlight scattered across every world. At the same time, the moonlight of every world gathered and formed me. I am the illusion the Crescent Moon desired. A moon that shines equally upon all.
“…A moon that shines equally? Then what about everything you’ve done? What about Seong Hyunjae? What about the Cradle?”
And what about all the people who had been caught up in it?
The moon continued calmly.
–I am the Moon of Wishes. Every movement I make is nothing more than the natural order of moonlight shining down, a phenomenon that occurs as it should, and the will the Crescent Moon left behind. I still hear every wish. When a heart yearns deeply enough, a small measure of fortune follows. The stronger the wish, the greater the power that reaches its owner under the name of luck.
“You did a hell of a lot more than give people a little luck!”
–The wishes of every existence are different. Health, wealth, love, honor. Most desires are intensely personal. A small, personal stroke of fortune is appropriate for a personal wish. But the end of all things is different. The Crescent Moon who served as my vessel, along with countless beings throughout every world, rejected the clear and certain destruction embodied by the Origin. They wished to escape it.
It was nearly impossible for every person to direct the same wish toward the same opponent.
Most wishes concerned the person making them. At their broadest, they might encompass family or friends.
Many people might share a wish to end a war or bring rain to a land suffering from drought. But even then, that shared desire would be confined to one or two countries, or at most a single world.
“…There must have been more wishes to stop the Origin than anyone could ever count.”
People who knew nothing of the Origin might simply have begged to be saved while monsters tore their world apart.
It seemed the Crescent Moon had interpreted even those cries as wishes for the Origin’s destruction.
–There were enough voices to sustain the Transcendent shaped like the Crescent Moon and drive her to action.
The being standing before me was not the Crescent Moon.
She was an existence born from the convergence of countless wishes, wearing the Crescent Moon’s form.
Yes.
The Moon of Wishes.
The name suited her.
–Your voice reached me as well.
“…I haven’t looked at the moon very often.”
But I must have wished for something at least once.
For Yuhyun to be safe.
For me to endure until the end, whatever it took, and bring my brother back.
Had a little of that luck reached me too?
I had survived with an ability that might as well have been a curse, but perhaps it had.
A strange feeling settled over me.
If that moon was an aggregate of wishes, then of course she could neither be persuaded nor truly conversed with. Talking to her was no different from shouting at a mountain or the sea.
She was closer to a force of nature, moving without a self as people’s voices guided her, just as the moon rose, set, waxed, and waned.
“…But Seong Hyunjae’s contract has been severed. You failed.”
–Yes. I have exhausted my strength and will soon fall asleep. The Moon of Wishes will continue to exist in the night skies of every world, but a great deal of time will pass before I can act so directly again.
The Crescent Moon’s gaze—no, the Moon of Wishes’ gaze—turned toward Seong Hyunjae.
He tilted his head slightly as he looked up at her.
–So long as the future remains unchanged and the most powerful wish continues to exist, I will repeat these actions again. But by then, you will no longer exist. My child, you are now completely free of me.
“I accept that gladly.”
“What do you mean, gladly? She just said you won’t exist!”
She was saying he would disappear!
Seong Hyunjae’s serene smile made my insides twist on his behalf.
“What exactly is wrong with you? There might still be a way to fix it!”
“I am rather like a balloon filled with water. Except that, from the very beginning, the balloon was held inside a glass vessel.”
“…What?”
“I filled and expanded within the container that supported and enclosed me. Then one day, the vessel abruptly disappeared, leaving the balloon swollen to its limit and forced to bear its entire weight alone.”
Seong Hyunjae lightly waved his hand.
“What do you suppose the odds are that the balloon will endure without bursting?”
“That’s…”
“Or perhaps a paper bag would be the better comparison. Imagine it crammed full of more weight than it can reasonably hold, while a hand supports it from beneath. Then imagine that hand being pulled away all at once. My situation is much the same.”
–The contracts bound the little moon, but their immense power also supported his very existence.
Then…
Then that meant…
“…The contract.”
Did he need to make another contract?
But the Moon of Wishes had exhausted most of her power. Reconnecting a contract that had already been severed would be impossible.
My mouth went dry.
After we had come this far.
After he had only just become free…
–Peep!
At that moment, I heard Chirp cry out.
I whipped my head around.
Young Chaos descended with the little white bird beside him.
“Sir!”
“The power of the Crescent Moon’s domain weakened. And what’s wrong with that one now?”
Young Chaos looked from the Crescent Moon to Seong Hyunjae, then clicked his tongue.
“Crescent Moon, I suppose you really aren’t the one I knew anymore.”
“Sir! I managed to break the Crescent Moon’s contract, but apparently the contract was also protecting Seong Hyunjae. Could you make a contract with him in her place—”
“No.”
Young Chaos cut me off without hesitation.
My legs faltered in the middle of running toward him.
“The Crescent Moon’s contracts have wrapped around that bastard one strand at a time since he still fell within the bounds of an ordinary human. There is no Transcendent who could create a contract capable of protecting something that has already become a Pseudo Origin. And even if it were possible, do you honestly think he would want it?”
“I…”
I looked back at Seong Hyunjae.
His golden eyes curved with his smile.
Of course he would not want to be bound again.
Even with his life at stake, he was not the kind of man who would surrender the freedom he had only just regained or give up the right to exist wholly as himself.
“But then… That means when I broke the contract… I…”
“I wanted to live as myself.”
Seong Hyunjae came toward me as he spoke.
“Even if that life has become considerably shorter, it is still a gift compared to wandering for ages with a leash around my throat. So it’s all right.”
I finally managed to raise my head and look at him.
He was not merely saying it to comfort me.
His face truly looked at peace.
There was even a faint trace of mischief in his expression.
“I should be able to hold together for a few days. Returning to our world would be dangerous, however. Is there a way to bring Song Taewon here briefly? Ah, that little villa of yours. Now that you’re a Transcendent, I imagine you could turn it into an aquarium.”
The drawer the King of Harmless had given me.
With my current abilities, I could probably reshape it into anything I wanted.
But after that…
I did not have much time left either.
Worse, I still had to leave Seong Hyunjae behind and go search for Yuhyun’s magic stone. Once the full seven days passed and I returned to F Rank, I might not even be able to remain beside Seong Hyunjae.
How many days did I have left now?
I stared desperately at Young Chaos.
He gave a short shake of his head.
I turned toward the Moon of Wishes.
Her moonlight was already fading.
“How can we just leave it like this? How can it end this way…”
“Firstborn.”
“If you knew you wouldn’t be able to endure, if you’d just told me—!”
But even if I had known…
I would still have cut through Seong Hyunjae’s contract.
Because that was what he wanted.
“…You said you would endure. You said you’d process all the power inside you and come back.”
“I meant that I would not give up. That remains true even now.”
“…Even now?”
Seong Hyunjae nodded.
Even as he failed to hold himself together.
Even as he was already beginning to collapse.
Yes.
That was how he had always been.
Seong Hyunjae had never abandoned himself.
He was even more incapable of giving up than I was.
At the very end, he had even released his hold on the death he had longed for.
“…Seong Hyunjae.”
He wanted to live as himself.
I clenched my fists.
He had not given up yet.
How could I be the one to let go?
–Peep.
The baby bird descended onto Seong Hyunjae’s head and spread his tiny wings wide.
A small, young bird.
A child who would continue to grow…
“You still want to live, don’t you?”
“Of course.”
Seong Hyunjae still wanted to live.
To keep living.
I took a step back and met his eyes directly.
“Compared to you, I used to be utterly inadequate. Anyone could see that. You looked down on me too.”
“I did.”
Everyone had considered me weak.
Even I had believed it.
Seong Hyunjae, on the other hand, was exceptional by anyone’s standards.
He had toyed with me, suppressed me, and threatened me. I had been intimidated by him. He had rescued me, and I had leaned on him and asked for his help.
“Then what about the Han Yujin standing before you now?”
I smiled as I asked.
Seong Hyunjae smiled in return.
“You are someone who no longer requires my judgment.”
“Yes. No matter what you say about me, I am myself. But answer the question anyway.”
I swallowed against my dry throat and spoke.
“Can you depend on me, Seong Hyunjae? Have I changed you?”
Had I affected him?
Had a clear and undeniable bond formed between us?
The silence did not last long.
Seong Hyunjae’s smile deepened.
“You truly did come to save me, my prince.”
“…Oh, come on! Seriously?”
“I trusted the memories you gave me and waited faithfully for your arrival.”
“You stole them from me in the first place! You’ve got some nerve!”
I burst out laughing.
Right.
There had never been any need to ask.
Both Seong Hyunjae and I could clearly feel what we had given each other and what we had received in return.
I wiped away the tears gathering in my eyes with my fingertips.
If he was going to say things like that, he could at least put on a dress. Princesses could wear whatever they wanted these days, but the man standing in front of me looked like he needed a costume before I could properly enjoy rescuing him.
“There was a time when I asked you not to change. I asked you to remain exactly where you were.”
“You asked me to stay.”
“I also asked you not to die, while I was at it.”
“I’m afraid I may fail to keep that promise. My apologies.”
My shoulders rose and fell with a small breath.
“Thank you for staying beside me until now.”
“Isn’t it a little early for farewells?”
“It is. Much too early.”
Someday, we would have to say them.
But not now.
“You know, being an adult doesn’t mean you’re incapable of growing. It doesn’t mean you stop having dreams. Anyone can change. Anyone can keep moving forward. No matter how old you are, you can still dream.”
I remembered the path of dreams Byeol had opened.
It had been a power meant for children.
But it had reached me as well.
I pictured the sight I had seen there and continued slowly.
“At first, I thought raising a child meant that the guardian chose the proper path and guided them along it. That was how I treated Yuhyun. I taught him and took care of him according to my own standards.”
I had wanted Yuhyun to live like an ordinary human being.
Because he lived within human society, a certain amount of that education had probably been necessary.
But in the end, Yuhyun had suppressed himself to become what I wanted, until he finally left me.
I had failed him.
“When I look back, it’s almost embarrassing that I ever received a title like Nurturer.”
“But the fact that you did your best has not changed.”
“No. But doing your best doesn’t mean you can’t be wrong. I simply didn’t know enough. I was inexperienced. It would be difficult to call that a sin. Anyone in my position probably would have done the same.”
Yuhyun and I had been far too different.
Yet we had grown up in an environment that made it almost impossible to recognize the true extent of that difference.
“Fortunately, after I turned back time, I had the chance to learn a great deal more. I was still lacking, but I tried to see more broadly. Yuhyun and the other kids each began searching for the paths they wanted.”
The Park Yerim I had known used ice.
That was why I had taught her ice focused skills and assumed she would naturally become a Hunter who specialized in the ice element.
But Yerim chose to pursue the Mermaid Queen’s power.
Without me realizing it, she had decided on her own path.
After meeting her future self and confronting the Mermaid Queen, she had begun moving beyond ice toward water—and toward the sea itself.
Peace had acquired a fluid transformation skill that no ordinary Flame Horned Lion possessed.
He had not wanted to become independent as a powerful Monster Mount. He wanted his life with me to continue.
He had grown jealous of creatures that could fly and obtained wings of his own.
Every one of those things had been Peace’s choice.
Myungwoo had followed the path I showed him.
But after I gave him that first bit of guidance, he ran forward so quickly that my hands could barely reach him anymore. Once he understood his abilities and desires, he had grown without hesitation, swiftly and smoothly.
With Noah, even I had lost my way.
Whether he reconciled with Liette or distanced himself from her was not something I had the right to decide.
All I could do was protect and support him.
Within that protection, Noah had found the path he wanted and taken Liette’s hand of his own accord.
There were also children who chose not to grow, a choice that seemed almost contrary to the power of a Nurturer.
But even while remaining where they were, they had their own reasons and their own goals.
On the path of dreams, Sorok had grown into a magnificent adult, while Belare had flown through the sky.
And that was hardly all.
A Water Dragon had grown wings and transformed into something wholly unexpected. Others had taken on the form of the person they considered their ideal.
“Watching all of them helped me understand.”
What I was supposed to do.
What I was capable of doing.
“Seong Hyunjae.”
Perfect Nurturer.
No.
Simply a nurturer.
“I love you.”
The power held within that title was—
“And whatever you wish to become…”
A prayer that the people precious to me would be able to walk their own paths.
Not the path their nurturer wanted for them.
Not the path I chose.
Every path they themselves wished to take.
Seong Hyunjae drew a short breath.
“…Han Yujin. Yujin.”
“It doesn’t matter how you change. It doesn’t matter what path you take. Only that it is the path you want. If you want to live, then live.”
And I wanted him to live too.
A soundless force began to move.
It wound gently around Seong Hyunjae and me.
After witnessing the path of dreams and looking back on everything that had happened before it, I had finally become certain of what it meant to be a Nurturer.
But I had not been confident.
Did I have the right to be recognized as Seong Hyunjae’s nurturer?
Seong Hyunjae had already taken the power of my title and used it himself.
It had helped him, but it had not been enough to resolve the countless years accumulated inside him.
Somewhere in the back of my mind, I had assumed that nothing I did would matter.
“This thing we call being a nurturer…”
The air stirred gently.
I could feel the fractures running through Seong Hyunjae beginning to disappear one by one.
“If you’ve had a positive influence on someone—if you helped them move forward—then isn’t that enough to call yourself their nurturer?”
The people who had seen me and been changed because of me.
Perhaps being directly connected to the world of dreams had played a role.
But Final Recompense had undeniably applied to them as well.
That was why I had thought it might work on the man standing in front of me.
I was Seong Hyunjae’s charge.
And I was his nurturer.
“‘I love you,’ was it?”
Seong Hyunjae’s hair stirred lightly.
For an instant, it seemed to gleam silver.
“You already noticed, didn’t you? The keyword.”
“To a certain extent.”
So he really had known.
“You used to say it occasionally in the beginning. Even to me.”
“Yes, I tried.”
“But after a certain point, you stopped. You said it often enough to your children, but you wouldn’t use it lightly with anyone else. Not even as a joke.”
“Well, it’s not exactly something you say casually.”
Going around telling everyone I loved them would be a little much.
“Perhaps it was intended to be the opposite.”
“What?”
“A keyword designed to make the words easier to say. An emotion a nurturer should express more often than anyone else.”
“…Oh.”
“And yet it made you even more reluctant to say it. How ironic.”
There was nothing wrong with saying that you loved someone.
In fact, it was probably better to say it often.
What harm would there be in making a habit of saying it every morning and evening?
As long as the feeling behind it was sincere, the words would surely remain pleasant no matter how many times you heard them.
“You’re right. It isn’t really something I should be embarrassed about. Wait. Hold on!”
“I love you, Yujin.”
A scream burst out of me before I could stop it.
Goose bumps swept over my entire body.
“No! I still can’t handle this! I need time to adjust. At least ten years!”
Seong Hyunjae chuckled as he watched me jump back in horror.
Young Chaos gave us a flat stare that plainly asked what the hell we were doing.
“There was likely also a restriction preventing the keyword from being discovered.”
“Still as frighteningly perceptive as ever. But I’m outside the former system’s influence now. The system’s restrictions were probably closer to guidelines.”
Originally, neither ranks nor abilities had absolute limits.
A Nurturer’s power that changed people after hearing “I love you” a few times.
When you thought about it, wasn’t that rather strange?
The system’s conditions existed to help people who had Awakened without warning use their skills more easily and comfortably while they adjusted.
But I no longer had a system.
I no longer had a skill window.
When I had first obtained a Transcendent’s power, that had confused me. I had not known how to use it without the system’s assistance.
“What I said to you just now probably wasn’t a keyword so much as an action meant to convey my feelings clearly.”
You were precious to me.
And I wanted to help you achieve what you desired.
I had felt it with absolute certainty the moment I spoke.
If I still had a skill window, the three characters of Seong Hyunjae’s name would have appeared upon it.
The special effect of keyword imprinting had not activated.
There had been no need for it.
I did not need to overwrite Seong Hyunjae’s mind with his own idea of what a nurturer should be.
He had accepted me exactly as I was.
I smiled broadly, an enormous weight finally lifting from my chest.
“Now let’s go home!”
Seong Hyunjae smiled back at me.
“I’m afraid that still won’t be possible.”
“Why not?!”
Not again!
I seized Seong Hyunjae by the torso.
He looked perfectly fine.
I could no longer feel any of the instability from before.
What was wrong with this damn body of his?
How could an S Rank be more fragile than glass?
Wasn’t he embarrassed to be falling apart in front of an F Rank?
“It isn’t that it will never be possible. Only that it is not possible yet.”
Seong Hyunjae spoke while I shook him violently.
Not yet?
“I have merely regained my stability. The power accumulated within me remains—”
“It’s still there? But shouldn’t you become whatever you want? I’m not an F Rank right now. I’m a Transcendent, so my power as a Nurturer should be that much stronger too—ow, ow, ow!”
Young Chaos grabbed my ear and twisted it hard.
Why did this still hurt when I had become as strong as a respectable Transcendent?
“What do you think you are, some kind of wishing stone?”
“Ow! You can explain without tearing my ear off!”
“A nurturer can provide the proper environment and all the support someone might need. But the result still depends upon that person. If you do everything for them and even decide and create the final outcome yourself, that isn’t nurturing. It’s breeding livestock, you fool.”
…
He was right.
My power had probably applied to Yuhyun, Yerim, and the others.
It had helped them grow more quickly and acquire new abilities, but they had still needed to experience and overcome the process for themselves.
They had struggled.
They had faced conflicts.
They had endured danger again and again.
“Then… what will happen to Seong Hyunjae?”
I rubbed my aching ear as I spoke.
“I intend to retrace the path I’ve traveled and put everything in order. The worlds themselves are gone, but their traces should remain.”
“From here onward, it’s a matter of that bastard’s own effort. But he’s stubborn enough that it shouldn’t take long. Thanks to you, Firstborn, there should be no danger involved either. No, I suppose that isn’t entirely true.”
“There is danger?!”
What now?
Young Chaos heaved a sigh and answered with the expression of someone who found all of this unbearably tiresome.
“He paraded himself around as a Pseudo Origin, didn’t he?”
“Oh.”
There were still Transcendents who would come after him.
Worse, now that the accumulated power inside him had stabilized, Seong Hyunjae seemed to have returned to S Rank.
Or perhaps he had become the “Seong Hyunjae” he himself desired to be.
Seong Hyunjae, the naturally born S Rank and guild master, no longer controlled by the power of a past he could not even remember.
“So there’s no helping it.”
Young Chaos crooked a finger at Seong Hyunjae.
Seong Hyunjae promptly went over to him.
“I’ll take him with me while he sorts through what he has accumulated. Now that my restrictions are gone, I may as well use the opportunity to inspect the Origins.”
If Sir, free of all his restrictions, was willing to look after him, there was no chance of anything happening to Seong Hyunjae.
With the possible exception of his ears and back.
“I’m not saying goodbye.”
I looked directly at Seong Hyunjae.
His faded hair glimmered faintly.
I still could not tell exactly what color it was becoming, but the thought occurred to me that perhaps his original hair had been silver.
What if his hair was not fading because it had been worn away?
What if he was reclaiming the original appearance the Crescent Moon had erased?
It would make sense.
He was someone who would never truly lose himself.
“This actually works out rather well. Hyunah said it would take Sigma at least a year to establish himself independently in our world without you. So I’m setting the coat’s rental period at one year. Return it before the late fees start piling up.”
“I’ll remember.”
“Well… I’ll allow an extension up to ten years. Not a day beyond that.”
I had to see his face again.
Young Chaos must have understood what I meant, because he clicked his tongue.
“I’m sure you’ll be all right, Han Yujin.”
“You have far too much faith in me.”
“I’ll send letters.”
“I’ll ask Myungwoo if he can receive interdimensional mail. Though your letters might be inspected.”
And what else?
Seong Hyunjae could manage his own meals.
With Sir beside him, there was nothing else I needed to worry about.
Jingle.
That was when it happened.
A single strand of moonlight descended in front of Seong Hyunjae.
The wavering light turned gold and gradually assumed a familiar form.
The elegant Seeker’s Chain.
Seong Hyunjae reached out and took hold of his chain.
–TL Notes–
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